Turning 30
The night before turning 30 I had a dream. I dreamt I was in my grandmothers apartment in Brazil. The apartment was massive and vacant. The curtains were shut and it was clearly uninhabited, which makes sense given she passed away 7 years ago.
I stood in the empty apartment observing the dust dance in circles, floating in the air as a ray of gentle light peeked through a window. I wanted to capture that beautiful moment, the movement, so I reached for my phone and turned on the camera. Someone next to me reached over and changed the mode, filtering the image. I didn’t want the filter, the beauty was in the rawness. So I tried to change it back to the original mode but when I managed, I looked up and it was too late. The light changed, and the dust had settled.
I woke up and jotted the dream down on a piece of paper. As the last day in my 20’s went by, I realized what the dream symbolized. The dream symbolized an awakening to a new sense of consciousness and confidence that is gifted with time. In time. The gift of seeing beauty even in the dirt. The beauty of seeing light, even when it’s dark.
The dream highlights the ephemeral nature of time and of moments. The importance of trusting your instincts, and following your intuition. The beauty of movement. The beauty of raw nature. The nature of women. In women. This dream was a gift. A gift that took time.
